A Little Off the Ears

Meme gave Sam his first haircut. The massive amount of hair had passed up his earlobes and was headed straight for the chin. We decided a little snip-snip wouldn't hurt. Plus, I didn't want people thinking he was a girl.

This does not prevent me, however, from wishing I could buy him a dress. The little girl clothes are so cute, and the boy clothes are so heather gray and football. Don't you think he would be cute in a dress? Behold my fantastic Microsoft Paint skills. Don't be jealous. This much crapiness takes minutes to master.

Fruit Trees

Go here to see a very lame attempt at a 360 view of our fruit trees.

Stick 'em Up!

The reason my brother, Stephen, won't get much work as a baby hair stylist.

The Taste of Success

Sam has been trying to pull this toy off his bouncy seat for some time. He has finally learned how to work his hands; well, he can kinda work his hands.

I rewarded him by changing out all his hanging toys. This will probably just annoy him. Hey, what are moms for?

Queen of the Night

This is a homely looking cactus, but the bloom makes it all worth it. The University of Arkansas Cooperative Extension reports that these night blooming cereus originates in the Carribean, and are not nursery plants, so you have to get a cutting. Ours came from Becky.

It is also called the midsummer night bloomer because it, well, it blooms in midsummer at night. That was a hard call for some botanist.

People on the Internet report braving mosquitoes and sleepy eyes to get a glimpse of it. I just wake up early and catch the bloom before it wilts.

Having A Rice Day

The first official feeding went well. I think some of it even got in his mouth.

Kung Fu Sam

Sam says,

"There is no charge for my awesomeness."

P.S. This movie is better if you sneak in a bowl of noodles.

P.S.S. Do not judge us creative geniuses. This fabulous low-tech photo edit was brought to you by Lizs and Microsoft Paint.

Weird Science

All those babysitting summer-breakers, hail the public library. I had my nieces, Sarah and Katie, and my nephew, Joe, all this week. Khaki and I are trading babysitting, so we can go to college this summer.





I took those chil'ren to the library and got a kitchen science experiment book. Some were very successful like this disappearing shell trick.



The name kind of makes writing a hypothesis a stupid endeavor; however, try it anyway. Put a raw egg in a jar with 3/4 cup of vinegar and watch what happens.


Some of the experiments were highly successful, like the egg trick and the volcano-in-a-bowl trick. Some were not so cool like the grow-a-crystal-out-of-alum-and-water trick, and the rub-bread-in-dust-and-watch-mold-grow trick.



Note to self: it obviously takes double-fiber wheat bread longer to grow mold than sugar-rich white bread.



The trick did remind me of one of the few times someone tried to set me up. My friend, Clay, told me he thought I would like this friend of his. What were these guys appealing qualities? Apparently he liked to hide food and watch things grow on it. Say what you will, the whole idea piqued my interest.


P.S. I have now used my allotted amount of hyphens for the week.

Fussy Baby

Dear Sam,

One day your gas will just annoy me with its stinkiness, but now it causes me actual pain. Please don't swallow any more bubbles. I hate to watch you cry. I tried and tried this morning to get you calm. I'm sorry if there are any lasting effects to taking two teething tablets, gum numb gel, and gas medicine all at the same time.

I rocked you inside. I rocked you outside. I rocked you standing up. I swung you. I feed you. I sang to you. Look at me and those mommy bags under my eyes. Can't you see I tried?

I wish someone would invent a burp machine. It would just massage the baby's stomach until she burped, and then lull her to sleep.

I'm not sure what was going on with you this morning. I feel as though I've failed. Sorry, child. This is the lot you drew when I became your mom.

Somewhere in the heat of a humid summer I think those gas bubbles stuck inside your stomach. They wouldn't budge. Then the sky began to rumble. You quieted down for that, and by the time the first rain drop fell you had burped, and laid down for you nap.

Praise be to God.

Dad's the Top Tomato

Worried about salmonella-tainted tomatoes? Here is our solution: grow your own. Seriously, can you not see that the universe wants you to grow and buy local?

Now, I will get back to sipping my lemonade. Picking that tomato was hard work, ya know? I mean, sure, Dad put in the garden, weeds the garden, waters the garden, and fertilizes the garden, but somebody has to go out and pick the the dang things. I'm pulling my share. Who do you think eats all those juicy tomatoes?

I'm sure Dad feels like the Little Red Hen a lot. "Who is going to help me pick the wheat, grind the wheat, mix the bread, bake the bread ... ?" But, I appreciate him A LOT. Who else could make my life so rich? He cooks me meals, gives good advice, watches 5,000 foreign films, and loves me lots. Here's to Dad! On top of everything else he does, he has saved me from salmonella!

Meme

That Sam loves his meme. She has some sort of magic baby dust that stops crankiness in its tracks and brings smiles whenever she is in the room. Sam is hypnotized by his meme. He will yank his head in all directions when he hears her voice, trying to get a glimpse. I think it might have something to do with the time I caught her sneaking him chocolate. Maybe it is that you get your free dose of baby dust after you've raised six kids and have a baker's dozen of grandkids.

Lesson in Teeth

So, we think Sam might be teething. I know it's a little early at three months, but he's got the river o' drool and monster crankiness.

I took him over to see his cousin Arsaloon's teeth. Flash those pearly whites big boy!
See I tried telling Sam that there are benefits to this whole teeth thing. I don't think he was buying it until he got to watch his cousin chow down on some strawberry.

Nice and 85

Actual words from an actual weather guy on KPLC tonight. "It's nice and cool out there right now at 85 degrees."

The forecast to the right is our cool outlook for the rest of the week. We will be serving Amber sidewalk fried eggs when she visits in July.

Hit 'Em With A Slugger

I thought you might enjoy this paragraph I had to write for my Reading Methods class. The assignment was to write a sequence paragraph on ANY TOPIC OF YOUR CHOICE. Dr. Callais did say ANY TOPIC OF YOUR CHOICE. He hasn't met may Lizs.

"Although slugs are no longer thought of as a delicacy, there is a history of it. The Yurok Indians of the North Coast dined on the gastropods. Then in the late 19th and early 20th centuries German immigrants were known to eat banana slugs, preparing the slugs like fish, gutted and fried, according to the pamphlet ''The Banana Slug - A Close Look at a Giant Forest Slug of Western North America,'' by Alice Bryant Harper. Later, eating slugs fell out of popularity with most everyone. Perhaps the last straw with slug snacks was in 2003 when an Australian man developed a rare form of meningitis after eating two leopard slugs on a dare. "

Moth-er Load

Joe thought he had hit pay dirt when he found this moth in the backyard. After clicking through dozens of moth pictures, I still can't identify this booger. Want to find a county list and images of moths in your area? WHY? Only odd bloggers with nothing else to do would want to do that. What? You fit in that category? OK. Go here.

Note: Sarah, who is in sixth grade, takes time out from the moth search to reapply her lip gloss.

Smiley Freddie

papa 064, originally uploaded by KevinSmiley.

This is my cousin Freddie with his scariest face. My Aunt Carolyn hated this picture. She doesn't seem to get her way much with photographs (See Below). I loved it, and ordered wallet sizes for him to pass out to his friends.

Boys rule!

Papa

My papa has been having a rough time lately. An extremely physically and mentally active 89-year-old, he was recently diagnosed with cancer of the bile duct.

I took this photograph of him on Mother's Day weekend. On the left is my mom and the far right, my Aunt Carolyn. My aunt wanted him to wear his teeth for the picture. He did not. She won. That is to say he beared those teeth good. She was frustrated about it, but we had a good laugh. He was certainly letting Carolyn see his teeth:)

P.S.: He has an interesing theory on global warming. Check it out.

Hera Lives!

hera 019, originally uploaded by KevinSmiley.

Hera has received her 10th life. I took this sad picture when we were considering putting Hera down. She had been gone for awhile, and decided not to eat. I called her original owner, Amber, and delivered the sad news only to find I was in the middle of a comitragedy.

Such is life with Hera.

I remember my first brush with her. A coonass got attacked by a chipmunk. Hera had brought in the half-dead chipmunk and stashed it in the closet while Amber was away. When my friend Amy's Cajun comrade was headed up the stairs he was met by the risen chipmunk, who decided to take its revenge out on his finger.

Ahh, Hera.

The cat that enters and exits the house by window, and not by request. The cat that battled it out for months with my crazy cat. Not just hissing, eyeing eachother in the hallway fight. We're talking full on cat fights.

Hera's fighting spirit.

When I moved to Louisiana we took Hera. She survived 16 hours on the road and a hotel stay all while high on powdered Valium. We thought this would calm here. She came down sometime in Georgia and was ready to eat.

Life on tour is not her thing.

Finally, she has settled in Sulphur with my sister. Besides an annoying Yorkie, she is living the life. We thought she was a gonner, but she decided to tell us how the cow ate the cabbage. Hera is eating, gaining weight, and back to sassy.

Hera has many, many lives.

S.A.M.

Sam2months 026, originally uploaded by KevinSmiley.

Here he is ... my first branch.
For Joy!